Age-Specific Tips

The Growing Personality

At this age:

• Games are taken very seriously, and losing can be taken personally
• Fantasy play becomes more realistic (Police vs. Batman)
• Children begin to develop sense of who they are based on how peers/friends treat them (i.e. if a peer says something hurtful, they may believe they are not liked)
• Humiliation, loss of respect and disapproval can be devastating
• Children can start to feel embarrassed by their parents, and parental limits are tested through negative behaviour. Reinforcing limits teaches children appropriate behaviour
• More complex peer relationships are formed, interactions are based on rules, and a pecking order begins to emerge
  
• Children start comparing their body image to others, and may make inaccurate judgments about their appearance
• Pride and enjoyment comes from doing something well (e.g. academics, sports, music, art, etc.)
• Privacy becomes important (ie. asking people to knock before entering their room)

Online Activities

• Use online games
  
• Use instant messaging (Live Messenger, Yahoo! Messenger, etc.)
  
• Use e-mail
  
• Use Internet for school work
  
• Use search engines (Google, Yahoo, Dogpile, etc.)
  
• Send pictures online
  

Safety Strategies

What you can do:

• Review with your child that the Internet is a public place. Just as you wouldn't send your child (at this age) to a movie by him/herself, don't send them on to the Internet alone.
  
• Consider putting the computer in a common area (kitchen, family room, etc.) where your child will have access to a parent or a guardian while using the computer
  
• Create and post Internet guidelines in your home and discuss them on a regular basis
  
• Use filtering software
  
• Limit the amount of time your child spends online
  
• Know your child's passwords and screen names
  
• Make sure that your child isn't communicating in chatrooms, which are typically unregulated. Also be aware that most games have an interactive chat feature
  
• Be cautious about allowing your child to use instant messaging as his/her sense of self comes from how he/she is treated by others.
  
• Discuss appropriate and inappropriate material. If exposed to inappropriate material online (sexually explicit, violent, etc.), teach your child to leave the computer and tell a trusted adult
  
• Teach your child to trust his/her instincts. Create "what if" scenarios to teach him/her how to recognize possible problems on the Internet
  
• Tell your child that he/she must have your permission before sharing personal information (full name, address, phone number, school name, photographs, etc.)
  
• Teach your child that the Internet is not the place to begin a friendship. Start friendships in person before talking online
  
• Teach assertiveness skills
  
• Communicate openly, listen and acknowledge feelings
  
• Tell your child to be careful about what they believe to be true. People can easily lie about their age, location or other details